An Interesting Conversation

As I flew home tonight I found myself in the middle of such an interesting conversation. The gentleman sitting beside me was probably close to 50. He was telling me about his family and somehow we stumbled into the gas crises that is currently hindering our world. Come to find out, he is an electrical engineer working in Spartanburg. He has been doing research on the world's energy consumption. The more he spoke of his research, the more fascinated I became. He was speaking about how we, as Americans, have not really increased the amount of energy that we consume each year. However, the more populated, poorer countries that have historically used less energy, are beginning to use more and more. He stated that this was due to the desire to have the "American" lifestyle...the lifestyle where things are easier and more accessible.

I have been thinking about how easy the "American" lifestyle is. Would things be different in current America if everything had not been so "easy"? After all, my generation is the generation of immediate gratification. I don't know what it is like to wonder if I will eat any more than rice each day or if my parents will have enough money to send me to school so that I have an education. There is so much that I have taken for granted that my parents so readily and lovingly provided. The security of a meal each night. The warmth of a bath...even when I didn't want to take one...a mattress and pillow to sleep on every night. All of these provisions became expectations of what is normal. What if I didn't have all of those things...how different would my life have been? Would I have been motivated to strive for more? Would I have even known that there was more?

As I ponder the great luxuries that became everyday expectations growing up, I am struck by how limited my view of what "real" life is all about. How fortunate I have been to have my most basic needs met...and how quickly I would surely parish had they not been. I am thankful to have grown up with the "American" lifestyle, but convicted of how much I have taken for granted. I am rambling on and on...just thought that I would share my thoughts....

Just One of Those Days

So little time, so much to do....please tell me that someone else gets overwhelmed by everyday life!

I think that I am coming to a harsh realization...life, daily life, is HARD! Do you ever find yourself wondering if your job will ever get better and allow you to enjoy life? Do you ever wonder if your house will look just like you want it to...not because of decoration or lack thereof...I mean, just have the laundry folded, the carpet vacuumed and the toilets cleaned? Life has been really crazy for me since moving back into a house that is all mine to take care of. I love it. I love being home. But, I do have to admit that living in someone else's home for 2 years erased my memory of what being a homeowner meant. I find myself dreaming...if I only had 2 weeks here...with nothing to do...that would be the life.

Even though I have had one of those days for the past week and a half, I still find that I am happy. Obviously I am not happy because of everything around me, I am happy because of what lives in my heart and the joy that is produced. If it weren't for the presence of Christ in my life I would be a miserable person. I am so thankful that in the midst of everyday yuck, God is so beautiful. I have found that if I take just a moment to reflect on who He is, my perspective changes. Now, I must confess....I do this A LOT during a day's time!

All in all, I believe that God is teaching me to just rest in Him when I feel that rest is no where in site. God is allowing me to feel stretched so thin so that only He may revive my spirit. I am just so thankful for how He teaches me things. As we head into the end of this week I wish you all a restful weekend in Him!

Peace, Grace and Mercy

Well, if you have been reading my blog since the beginning, I am sure that you are all too aware of the fact that I was moving back to South Carolina. I am very happy to tell you that I am back in South Carolina and, most importantly, I am home!!!

In the weeks leading up to the move, I became very apprehensive of why I was so CALLED back to South Carolina. Wilmington was feeling more and more like home the longer that I stayed there. Even though there were so many things about Wilmington that I did not like, the pros were definitely outweighing the cons. Everyone kept asking why I was moving. The only reasons I had for moving was that it was right and was what God was calling me to do. Those answers do not satisfy most people. Everyone wanted to know if I had a different job, a new man or any other good reason to move away from a completely comfortable life in Wilmington. The more others asked the question of me, the more I asked the same of God. In the midst of all the questioning, though, I still had a complete peace about my decision. That peace, the peace that only comes from the Father, is what sustained me and kept me on track. I am so thankful for the peace that only God can give. You can't wrap words around it, you can only experience it and you can only experience when you are right, smack-dab in the middle of obedience.

God is just so good. He knew that I would go through all of the emotions that I did in the immediate weeks prior to moving. His grace was more than sufficient as I cried on late night flights or in my hotel room at night. His grace was comfort. Although I was sad that I had to leave my friends and life in Wilmington, it was only by His grace that I had joy in those very difficult and lonely times.

God always, always provides what we need right when we need it. It was just last Monday that I was thinking about leaving and all that I had to do to be prepared for the move. I was at a low point, wondering if my friendships that I left behind 2 years ago would be the same. I wondered if I would be lonelier than before I left South Carolina. I had indeed changed, so I know that my friends had too. I was just worried that I would have no friends. If you know me well, you know that I love friends and cherish all of my relationships. God was not surprised by all of the fears that were being perpetuated by Satan's lies. I opened up my email that night and saw an invitation to Supper Club. Before I moved to Wilmington, a group of girls would meet for supper club once or twice a month. I believe that Supper Club kind of fizzled and this was an attempt at kicking it off again. This may seem very insignificant to you, but in that moment I felt God's mercy engulf me. He gently whispered to me..."I will never leave you or forsake you...I love you."

Now that the move is complete and I am back in my home, I am really surprised by how easy everything has been. The time leading up to me leaving Wilmington was the hardest. I am excited to see what God has planned for me. But, as I walk away from this experience, I walk away a completely different woman. God has forever changed my heart.

If you feel God calling you to the impossible...go for it! You will never be sorry and you will learn to love and trust God in big and mighty ways.